That being said, I was bored as hell during last nights Home Run Derby. Each year is the same as the last. The first round is fun watching the newest phenom/power hitter/great story get his shot at glory, but with a 3+ hour running time, it gets old fast. From Mark McGwire in his prime to Barry Bonds when he was a God to the great story of Josh Hamilton and the accelerated emergence of Mark Trumbo, there always seems to be a story for viewers to get attached to. But what do you do with the last 2 hours of the broadcast?
Obviously viewers hate Chris Berman and they're sick of his shtick. ESPN produces the Derby in the same style every year. Berman yelling, player reactions and that's it. Sure they try and build drama up as if the Derby means anything and it was good to have a true villain in Robinson Cano last night, but for the most part its a complete waste of time.
I'm here to present some new events to 1) keep viewers and bring in a new batch 2) highlight the skill sets of non pure power hitters 3) allow ball players to showcase their personalities to a broader audience 4) get more players involved.
First, how to fix the Home Run Derby:
Change it to 5 hitters with only 2 rounds. Take two of the best power hitters from each league and then invite the best power hitter from the host city whether he is an All-Star or not. You now have invested fans in the crowd to go along with the normal corporate big wigs who could care less about what is going on. The two rounds shorten the event to a manageable time frame and opens up time for other events.
What other events you ask?
I want to get the pitchers involved, but in a way that they won't fear injuring their arm. What i suggest is carnival games to test the pitchers accuracy. This will allow them to get mic'd up and still showcase some skill. Let's line up some milk bottles and have the pitchers throw at them to win prizes for charity or children. I got my inspiration from a Seattle Mariners commercial starring Felix Hernandez.
Another event that I think would be great and help raise money for charity would be a dunk tank. What fun event is a better way to showcase personality and accuracy than a dunk tank? Fans can pay money (all to charity) to go up against a rival teams pitcher. As a Nationals fan I would love to sit there while hated rival Cole Hamels tries to dunk me. I could lightly heckle him and then hopefully you get an autograph from your favorite player for your troubles.
Next up for the speeders would be a fastest around the bases contest. I remember watching Darryl Green and Willie Gault face off in a sprint contest for the NFL's fastest player contest and thought it was great. Line up players like Michael Bourn, Elvis Andrus and even future speedster Billy Hamilton from the Futures game at home plate and time them going around the bases. To this day people still talk about watching Deion Sanders running the base paths because of how fast he was and I want to bring that aspect of the game back into the light.
When players are talked about being a 'five tool player' it means they can hit for power, average, run well, play good defense and throw well. I want to showcase outfield throwing ability. Lets run the Tom Emanski video skill contest. Line up a trash can on its side at the plate and have the best arms in baseball throw a ball into it from center field. Any baseball player remembers Fred McGriff endorsing these videos:
Just like in hockey when there are breakable targets in the shooting accuracy challenge, baseball can build targets to aim at as Bryce Harper launches a laser from right field to third base. It would be a joy to watch.
The last event I'd like to see is a six inning rookie versus sophomore game. The NBA has it and it is a great way for viewers to learn some new names from around the league. Make it shorter than the real game to keep the roster size smaller, but allow the future of MLB to go to an All-Star week to get some valued exposure and experience.
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While in Texas I went and saw the movie 'Ted'. It was rather funny even if most of the best jokes were shown in the extended cut trailer. Just like in Family Guy, Seth MacFarlane hearkens back to his youth with references from the 80's and early 90's. He is five years older than I am, but the gap isn't large enough where I don't get the jokes. Sure I don't know all of the references, but the ones I know of are great.
There was a spoof of the the spoof movie Airplane which, judging by the audiences reaction, not many people got. I saw the movie in Austin which is a younger city and the crowd looked to be littered with college kids and younger (a family of five with the children no older than 11...awful parenting there). I can tell you that some of the jokes probably went way over their heads and even though they laughed at the jokes, they missed out on the connection.
*Spoiler Alert*
The bulk of the second half of the movie involves the lead character from the 1980 movie Flash Gordon, which I can say I've never seen. That was a bit of a letdown because I had no connection to the film nor the main character Sam Jones so I couldn't relate to the obsession that Mark Wahlberg and Ted had. It was still funny, but not to the extent that I'm sure Seth MacFarlane and fans of the cult hit felt.
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